21 May, 2011

Left side! Strong side! ('Remember the Titans')

I was struggling to come up with an idea for today's rant so I decided to bitch about my boyfriend and HELL-O! I struck gold. The bastard stole my side of the bed!
Although it has changed a lot over the last year, I've finally settled into sleeping on the left side of the bed and I can't be against the wall only to sleep over and have my grandeur's of a good night sleep destroyed. Trent actually MOVED me over.
Trent was out watchnig a movie and I got so tired I just gave up and went to sleep in his bed. On the left side. At three o'clock-IN THE MORNING! Not happy- he came in and wiggled me onto the other side of the bed. Now I wasn't happy about this already but what he did next was worse.
He put a movie on to help him sleep.
There is no way I can sleep with noise. My stepsister's snoring wakes me right up.
He wrapped both his arms around me which was an amazingly secure feeling but it also meant I couldn't escape his dastardly clutches without waking him up. DAMN! In the end, I was so tired from over-thinking ways to get up without waking him (how sweet, not wanting to wake him after what he did!) that I ended up getting out of bed at six-thirty to help his house mate's kids get ready to go stay at their dad's.
When Trent left for work and I went home, I decided to change my side of the bed. For the last month or so, I've been sleeping on the right side with my massive teddy in the way to stop me creeping over. It sucks. It sucks so bad. Sleeping this way doesn't feel natural! It takes ages to fall asleep, I toss and turn all night and I just really miss my side of the bed!
A few nights ago, I kicked my teddy off the bed and shuffled my way onto the left side. Left side = orgasm face. It was the best sleep ever. No moving, no lying awake and no cranky morning mood! I've even fallen asleep just sitting on the left side of my bed doing homework.
My body knows. Trent has deprived me of a most basic but necessary and important right: access to the left side of the bed!
Now to explain all this to him without looking like I've given it too much consideration...

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